Breaking Free from Old Beliefs into Love and Abundance

If you ever feel that in spite of your best intentions and even great effort, you still seem unable to create and/or maintain the loving relationship you desire, then the following approach might help you.

Take a moment to reflect on your parents and your upbringing as a child. Make a list of what your mother and father believed about sex and love.

Now, consider the following list and answer for yourself, did you parents believe and tell you at an appropriate age that:

* sex is a gift from God and it is your right to enjoy it fully;
* sexual energy creates great pleasure and expands love;
* it is important to make love to yourself to find out what you like so you can tell your lover;
* moving sexual energy is healthy for your body, mind and spirit;
* it is your responsibly to achieve orgasms;
* you have the right to ask how you want to be touched and kissed, and where;
* you take turns in giving and receiving pleasure;
* before making love, clear out resentments that might create a bigger disturbance if not addressed;
* making love out of duty creates a rift in your soul;
* looking into each other's eyes in a soft way increases your openness to give and receive love.

If you answered no to several of these points, or if this list is quite different from your first list of your parents' beliefs about love and sex, you might consider doing the work of changing those beliefs into your own empowering beliefs.

Perhaps your parents themselves were never exposed to these ideas, and they might have felt shame or guilt about their own sexuality.

In that case, even if they told you all or some of the above, you might have received instead their unconscious message that sex was shameful.

That happens because as a child you live on an emotional level, so you absorb what your parents believe in their guts more than what they tell you with words, even when they believe their words at an intellectual, thinking level.

Now that you are a grown up, it is your right to check in with yourself and see where you are still unconsciously faithful to your parents' beliefs. This may be challenging emotionally - you took in what they believed because you loved them, and changing those beliefs might feel to you like a betrayal of your love.

You can both love your parents for who they are, without judgement, and also find and own your own beliefs that will empower you to a richer and more pleasurable life.

To bring those beliefs up into the conscious mind --where beliefs can be changed --takes intention, introspection, commitment, and a special breathing which I call "Ocean Breath," one of the most important Tantric breathing techniques.

As you know, unless the foundation of a building is firm, the building may collapse. Make sure that the foundation of your love-building is strong, so you can build it as high as you want in strength and safety.

Blessings,

Carla Tara

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The Best Way to Succeed with Any Woman

A popular online men’s magazine, Askmen.com, recently ran an article by David DeAngelo called “Top 10: Ways To Succeed With Any Woman.” When you boil them down, David’s ten ways all return to a common theme – that a man needs to be secure within himself.

I love most of the ways David suggests that a man do this in this interesting article, especially his advice: “Don’t give all of yourself to just any woman,” and “Stop worrying about what she’s thinking.” To these, I would add “be more concerned with what both you and she are feeling when you are with each other.”

I do have to disagree with David though, on suggesting that a man should feel like a star, with the women in his life revolving around him like planets. A star is often seen as perfect, as greater than life… And many stars feel they don’t match the projections put on them and don’t feel very good inside. Some of them I talk with say “If they knew how stressful my life is and how difficult it is to keep the appearance of having it all together!…”

To me, the more real the man is and therefore showing his human qualities, the more a real woman likes him, and then she can safely and powerfully rise in love with him.

If he behaves like a star, she might think he’s too much for her, or see him as cocky, or-- if she’s not as mature, she might be tempted to please him all the time -- because she does feel like a planet revolving around him.

If he is mature he might not like that at all.

Playing at “being a star” might be acceptable for teenagers, but not for mature lovers.

A real man loves to make his woman happy and treats her like a Goddess.

A real man knows how to pay attention to her and discover who she really is.

If she shows her real self, his greatest pleasure is seeing her happy in life and in ecstasy in sex. The more he shows his affection and knows how to make her happy, the higher his self-esteem as a man goes.

Of course, he wants to be treated with full respect and love as well. To me, that is the best approach to be successful with any woman.

Ciao!
Carla


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Tantric Sex Increases Mental Power

Ancient Tantric knowledge makes us aware of the importance of sex to keep the brain functioning well into older age. In fact, great sex is the most pleasurable way to keep the brain functioning at its peak.

Science is now starting to prove it in a small way.
There are some attempts being made to measure how sex hormones influence the brain. In fact, a breakthrough study at the University of Calgary --published Jan 2003 in the prestigious Science Journal -- says that a hormone stimulated by sex may cause the production of new brain cells.

It would be interesting to see research done on Tantric lovemaking! It might be the next breakthrough…. In fact, during Tantric lovemaking you stimulate your body and your brain for much longer periods of time, and take it to higher levels than in regular sex.

Tantric sex requires complete presence to what is happening in your body and in your partner’s body. There are trillions of cells in the body, and all are involved in feeling sensations. The involvement is astronomical compared to that of regular sex.

So, it is easy to understand that if you have two or three hours of Tantric connection, you will have flooded your brain with pleasurable information that produces happy hormones and hormones that increase desire and bonding.

What can make your brain “sluggish” is being stuck in habits and routine. The brain loves newness, and Tantra suggests that you use different ways of connecting sexually, different positions, different ways of kissing, different places to make love in.

When you stay in the moment, you are as creative as children who are not habit bound yet.

Here is your Tantric tip:

Touch your lover with a different touch, for instance slower and more consciously than usual. Most women that I see in my sessions complain that their man moves his hands too fast and almost mechanically. Try a different way of touching and notice the results you are creating in your and her brain!

Have great sex and expand your brain!

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