Wednesday, October 8, 2008

My blog is moving to my new website!!

To all my readers and students,

Thank you so much for your attention and support for my writing and teaching. It gives me so much satisfaction to see people make the connections with their own sexuality and higher self that put them on their own path to greater and greater heights of bliss.

I hope you will follow me to my new website - which I am very excited about!

You can find it at

Remember to update your bookmarks too!

Carla

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Breaking Free from Old Beliefs into Love and Abundance

If you ever feel that in spite of your best intentions and even great effort, you still seem unable to create and/or maintain the loving relationship you desire, then the following approach might help you.

Take a moment to reflect on your parents and your upbringing as a child. Make a list of what your mother and father believed about sex and love.

Now, consider the following list and answer for yourself, did you parents believe and tell you at an appropriate age that:

* sex is a gift from God and it is your right to enjoy it fully;
* sexual energy creates great pleasure and expands love;
* it is important to make love to yourself to find out what you like so you can tell your lover;
* moving sexual energy is healthy for your body, mind and spirit;
* it is your responsibly to achieve orgasms;
* you have the right to ask how you want to be touched and kissed, and where;
* you take turns in giving and receiving pleasure;
* before making love, clear out resentments that might create a bigger disturbance if not addressed;
* making love out of duty creates a rift in your soul;
* looking into each other's eyes in a soft way increases your openness to give and receive love.

If you answered no to several of these points, or if this list is quite different from your first list of your parents' beliefs about love and sex, you might consider doing the work of changing those beliefs into your own empowering beliefs.

Perhaps your parents themselves were never exposed to these ideas, and they might have felt shame or guilt about their own sexuality.

In that case, even if they told you all or some of the above, you might have received instead their unconscious message that sex was shameful.

That happens because as a child you live on an emotional level, so you absorb what your parents believe in their guts more than what they tell you with words, even when they believe their words at an intellectual, thinking level.

Now that you are a grown up, it is your right to check in with yourself and see where you are still unconsciously faithful to your parents' beliefs. This may be challenging emotionally - you took in what they believed because you loved them, and changing those beliefs might feel to you like a betrayal of your love.

You can both love your parents for who they are, without judgement, and also find and own your own beliefs that will empower you to a richer and more pleasurable life.

To bring those beliefs up into the conscious mind --where beliefs can be changed --takes intention, introspection, commitment, and a special breathing which I call "Ocean Breath," one of the most important Tantric breathing techniques.

As you know, unless the foundation of a building is firm, the building may collapse. Make sure that the foundation of your love-building is strong, so you can build it as high as you want in strength and safety.


Carla Tara


Sunday, August 3, 2008

A Letter I Received

I was delighted to receive this testimonial recently, and I wanted to share it with you because it touched my heart and I know it will inspire you to take another step on your journey into Intimacy and Love.

Carla, your book "Lessons from a Tantric Tango Dancer: A Journey into Intimacy, Relationships and Love" inspired me to breathe more fully, discover more of who I am and have the courage to experience more fulfillment and joy in my life.

Your lessons on how to change negative beliefs into positive, life affirming ones are simple and really work.

Both your vision and your down-to-earth techniques have helped me move through a couple of difficult experiences maintaining my balance and keeping my heart open. Thank you for your generosity in sharing yourself.

Miranda Fisher

Receiving testimonials like this inspires me to deepen and expand my work to help you to create a life of more pleasure.


Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Why Tantric Healing is Essential

We are born whole with an infinite potential for joy and ecstasy. We feel entitled to being taking care of. We are enthusiastic about discovering our world.

However, many people have been wounded either by neglect or by being treated as a burden from mother, father, or other family member. This has contributed greatly to the erosion of our trust in life.

Without that safety, we cannot open up fully to experience our full potential.

Healing means restoring you to your original wholeness.

A trained Tantrika can help you reconnect with the Universal Mother, the Goddess, who treats you like the special person you really are. We all have the archetype of the Goddess/Mother within.

As you restore trust you can start feeling worthy of the infinite potential of love. Once this basic trust that your survival is assured, other wounding can be addressed.

Another source of wounding for many people is the way we were taught the restricting rules of society. "Don't do this, don't do that. . ." If you are a boy: "Don't cry!" If you are a girl: "don't be angry!" You started feeling boxed in.

Every time you suffered a shocking experience when someone shamed you for feeling sexual or hurt you in any way, you locked up some of you natural, exuberant passion you were born with.

Remnants of sexual wounding are usually found in the water-based sexual center, and a skilled Tantrika can help you melt it and experience your full sexual potential.

If you were improperly touched or sexually abused, you probably felt powerless because the abuser obviously did not ask your permission. So you might have a block in your power center.

When you are "used" for someone else's pleasure your brain connects sexual pleasure only with the genitals and not with the heart, thus creating the split between sex and love.

And some of our religions have done similar damage to our psyche by creating the split between sex and spirit.

In my sessions, I set and hold the intention of connecting with and opening all the energy centers.

As a healer, a tantrika creates a safe space for your feelings and listens to your words, and especially pays attention to images and body language. Your unconscious reveals itself through images, sensations and body language.

Expanded sexual energy always helps unblock when you feel safe.

Transformation happens when we befriend the unconscious and establish a healthy connection to the present time. Unproductive or negative patterns can dissolve and you can restore your full potential for a fulfilling love life.

Tantric healing opens up enormous amount of energy that becomes available for your lovemaking.


Thursday, July 3, 2008

Listen to Carla Talk About Tantra and Rejuvenation

Francesca Gentille, host of "Sex, Tantra, and Kama Sutra," interviews Carla about Tantra as a healing process, and a rejuvenation and relationship tool.

Learn how Tantra moves beyond psychotherapy to develop the emotional-physical bond and rejuvenates the body and mind. Carla explains how to work with a Tantrika, convenient rituals you can do at home to establish deep connection with your lover, and how to use Tantric communication to open your heart to more connected and authentic sex.

Listen to the podcast >>

Read the transcript of the interview >>


Friday, June 27, 2008

The Five Types of Yoni: Part Four - The Orchid

Men, you are so lucky to have such variety of flowers in the female garden for your pleasure. Getting to know and appreciate each one of them is a worthwhile activity that will pay off immensely.

Today we are looking at the Orchid.

This yoni looks voluptuous and rich. The clitoris has many folds, each one a world to explore. This woman likes lots of foreplay.

The distance between the clitoris and the introitus is several fingers long.
The taste of her Amrita is a little salty.

Her g spot is mid-back of her pubic bone, deeper than you would expect.
Her cave is rather shallow; however it can deepen as she gets more excited.

When you do oral, she likes her hood lifted up and sucked on. This is different than some other women, who do not like their clitorises to be sucked on unhooded.

Although she prefers oral, she also likes finger probing and the finger is invited to
move in all directions.

When it comes to intercourse, she likes to keep it shallow, because otherwise it hurts her, therefore one of her favorite positions is spooning and thrusting from side angles. She likes pubic to pubic grinding as well. I would recommend that you don’t lift her legs because it would go in too deep and it would hurt her.

She prefers a thick and not too long lingam. If your lingam is very long, and you like full blown thrusting, you can ask her to hold her hand around it to make sure it does not go all in. This will satisfy you, and still be comfortable for her.

Enjoy getting to know the woman who cultivates this wonderful flower.


Friday, June 20, 2008

Tantra Helps Maintain Youthfulness

You might know individuals in their forties, fifties, sixties and even older who think, act, and look much younger than their chronological age. Their youthful attitude permeates their entire life. They keep their love relationships fresh, exciting, sensuous and intimate. Couples’ feelings for each other deepen and sexual attraction remains as strong as it was when they first fell in love.

These people live a Tantric life whether or not they have studied the Tantric secrets.

Some people are directly attuned to this knowledge. After all, the entire knowledge of the whole universe comes through to us if our mind is open and quiet enough to let it in. To receive the knowledge you have to have a firm intention to receive it, and a mind that is strong and flexible enough be open to it.

If your mind tends to be scattered, or stuck in old paradigms, Tantric training can help you. Tantra can also help if you have a job that requires you to be “inside your mind” a lot.

Through tantric training you learn to focus your mind on what works to achieve the deepest connection with body, mind and spirit. You are paying attention to the sensations in your body and you breathe deeply so they expand into higher excitement.

You are letting go of all thoughts based on comparisons, you are letting go of goals of performance, and you trust your natural sexuality, which is not mind-driven.

Sexual performance remains vigorous since you can sustain the excitement of riding the waves preceding the ejaculation much longer than you used to before practicing Tantra.

And yet, there is more to Tantra than enhanced sexual relationships. A Tantric lifestyle is all-encompassing, and includes more flexibility in mind and body, radiant health, feeling more youthful, and higher self-esteem. All of this serves to enhance both the work life and the family life. Health, flexibility, enhanced sexuality, and youthfulness become a self-feeding loop, constantly leading to higher vitality and inner satisfaction.

Those who understand and practice the Tantric principles realize that they have found the true Fountain of Youth.